All my *spoiler-heavy* thoughts about Avengers: Endgame

Last week I published a spoiler-free review of Avengers: Endgame because that was the decent thing to do. But I struggled to avoid the spoilers because there are so many of them throughout the film and I had so many things I wanted to talk about but couldn’t! Now that opening weekend is over I feel like it’s now time for me to get it all out. Needless to say, spoilers ahead.

DO NOT READ IF YOU HAVE NOT WATCHED ENDGAME. HEAVY HEAVY HEAVY SPOILERS! CONSIDER YOURSELF WARNED.

I was originally thinking of doing another review, but I don’t feel like that’s necessary. Instead, this is going to be more like a collection of assorted thoughts organised under relevant headings. Let me know if you agree.

How the storylines for the original Avengers concluded:

1. Tony Stark/Iron Man (Robert Downey Jr) – I predicted that either Iron Man or Captain America (Chris Evans) would die at the end of Avengers: Endgame and Marvel earned my utmost respect for actually doing it. It makes sense for it to be Stark – the MCU began with his standalone movie in 2008 so his origins story and his death serve as bookmarks of this phase of the MCU. Also in the trailer, he said “part of the journey is the end” – foreshadowing? It was super upsetting but it felt like a fitting way for him to go. I like that “I am Iron Man” moment he got with Thanos (Josh Brolin), that he died through making a sacrifice and that Pepper Potts (Gwyneth Paltrow) was fighting alongside him at the time. I was crying already but when she said to him “you can rest now” I was an emotional wreck!

2. Steve Rogers/Captain America (Evans) – I’m glad that both him and Iron Man didn’t die, that would have been too much to handle. It was nice, super satisfying and so bloomin’ lovely that I got emotional at that too. I love that he’s now an old man – the CGI for that was incredible by the way – and that he got his happy ending with Peggy (Hayley Atwell). And he passed on his shield to Sam (Anthony Mackie)!

3. Natasha Romanoff/Black Widow (Scarlett Johansson) – Now this is the one I have an issue with. I really wanted Hawkeye (Jeremy Renner) to sacrifice himself for the Soul Stone and I was super bummed that she went instead. I didn’t expect her to go due to the news of a Black Widow standalone movie, I don’t care about Clint (sorry) and it felt like her death was sort of buried under all the later bombshells. It didn’t have the right amount of gravity! They were sad for a moment but then it was onto the next thing. I wished she was there kicking ass in the final battle too. Poor Black Widow.

4. Bruce Banner/Hulk (Mark Ruffalo) – He didn’t get his own ending! WTF?! I hope he continues playing Hulk and when he finally bows out he’s given a proper conclusion. He was just part of Cap’s storyline, helping him jump through time. Hopefully, we’ll get more of the new and improved Bruce (love his makeover)!

5. Thor (Chris Hemsworth) – Does this mean Hemsworth will continue playing Thor? Will he be joining the Guardians of the Galaxy franchise? He had great chemistry with them, particularly Rocket (Bradley Cooper), in Infinity War but I’m not sure how I feel about him becoming part of another set of films. However, I’m glad he’s not leaving us (I assume). I liked him making Valkyrie (Tessa Thompson) king of New Asgard, which was very cool.

6. Clint Barton/Hawkeye (Renner) – He’s always been my least favourite Avenger and I would have preferred him to go over Black Widow. It’s cute that he ends up with his family, which is where he started before the snap.

 

The standout lines/moments

1. Fat Thor – I laughed at this way more than everyone else around me. Every time he came onscreen he made me smile and when Tony called him “Lebowski” I absolutely creased up as I had just thought he looked like The Dude.

2. Captain America using Mjolnir (Thor’s hammer) – This happens in the comics and had been predicted for Endgame but it was an epic moment. I bet many fans went nuts at this. So cool! I want to revisit that whole sequence again. This leads me to…

3. 2012 Cap vs. Present Cap – I’m not gonna lie, the whole time travel thing went over my head and I didn’t get it at all, but this fight sequence was such an exciting watch!

4. When the portals opened up and everyone appeared on the battlefield, lined up and then Cap said, “Avengers Assemble.” HELLL YEEEEEEAAAAAHHHH!!!!

5. Hulk attempting to angrily smash things like 2012 Hulk but not doing it very well.

6. Girl power – That brief (wayyyy too brief) moment when the ladies of the MCU teamed up to help Captain Marvel (Brie Larson) get the infinity gauntlet to the quantum tunnel. MORE OF THIS PLEASE! Shame Black Widow wasn’t involved 🙁  I’ve read a lot of criticism about this moment – that it was too clunky, a bit awkward and tacky – and I do agree with that in hindsight, but I just felt excited by it at the time.

7. Tony meeting his dad – The time travel really enabled the Russos to make moments that would excite the fans and give us lots of throwback feels and one of those was watching Tony meet his dad Howard (John Slattery). Brilliant.

8. Wanda Maximoff/Scarlet Witch (Elizabeth Olsen) getting a moment – most of the fallen didn’t have much opportunity to shine by the time they reappeared but I’m glad Wanda was given a brief period of avenging Vision’s death.

9. Peter Parker’s moment with Tony Stark – Likewise, Spider-Man (Tom Holland) came in at the last minute but was given a few good chances in the spotlight, including a really sweet exchange with Tony.

10. Joe Russo‘s cameo in a group therapy session with Steve. I don’t even remember what he said, but I enjoyed his appearance. Apparently, he’s playing the MCU first’s gay character and the LGBTQ community wasn’t here for it.

11. “That’s America’s ass”. Yes, it is!

12. Scott Lang/Ant-Man (Paul Rudd) bitching about Back to the Future (I can’t remember the exact line) and reeling off a bunch of time-travel movies. Hot Tub Time Machine hahaha!

 

A random assortment of remaining thoughts

1. Nebula (Karen Gillan) was in it way more than I expected. She had a really important, dual role and I did not see that coming. Gillan is awesome but that voice really grates on me. Does it not make her throat sore?!

2. I liked that the Russos found a way of using Gamora (Zoe Saldana) without bringing her back from the dead. I like that the ones that properly died in Infinity War stayed dead and they cleverly found a way to get her involved.

3. I liked that some big characters died. I would have felt disappointed and short-changed if nobody did because that doesn’t seem realistic.

4. My excitement at cameos went something like this – “Ken Jeong?! Tilda Swinton?! Korg! Taika Waititi! Michelle Pfeiffer! Young Michael Douglas! Natalie Portman! Howard Stark! Rene Russo!”

5. I didn’t like Carol’s super short crop.

6. I enjoyed revisiting old places, particularly the New York battle from Avengers Assemble. It brought back so many feelings! I loved seeing those 2012 scenes from a new perspective too.

7. Are we supposed to buy the fact that a random rat managed to magically turn Scott’s quantum tunnel back on after five years?! I’m a bit cynical about that one.

8. I still have real issues with Valkyrie’s British accent.

9. Rudd is fantastic and probably my favourite actor in the film. He was so goddamn funny! Hopefully, we get to see more of him in the MCU.